Use Referent Power As A Normal Person

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question may be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there is a true injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It’s that if you don’t arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you now, and you could say, well, I do not care about that, but that is actually not true. You actually do care about that because if you’re in pain, you will care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it is very rare you could find somebody who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this sort of pain is one of those things that brings the notion that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It’s something like, look around for something which disturbs you and see if you can repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do this in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a room, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I must do?

And you have to ask yourself that, right? It is not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there are a good thing. And you know, you have not, there is some rubbish behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the room would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the cables, were not all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you let yourself just to think about the expanse where you exist at that moment, there will be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it that you can just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you were coming to see me for psychotherapy, this easiest thing for us to do first would just be to get you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say start where you can start.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, that you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat daily, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you’ve got your routines which you go through daily. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out immediately. So a hundred alterations to your broader domain of being, and there is a lot less rubbish and there’s a lot less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and once you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself itself and start fixing up the things which are a part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there is this guy who’s like alcoholic and schizophrenia and has been on the streets for 10 years. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be good if you could fix it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to repair that. You just walk around that and go find something that you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it’s very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it is you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter that is not working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to stay within your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do this at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your mind is a very strange thing. As soon as you give it a name, a genuine aim, it’ll reconfigure the entire world in keeping with this goal. That’s actually how you see to start with. And so in case you set it a job, especially you’ve got to be real about it, and that’s why you have to bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you have to get them in your body. So you are acting consistently. You’ve got to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself around that goal, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video where you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and do not see it.

It is like, you know, in case you thought about that experiment for around five decades, that would be about the ideal amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you can get one thing through your mind and as a result of even being in university, that would be a good one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to reduce everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and that means you don’t need to take anythingthat specific phrase too much, you need to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it is still a terrific thing to ask.