Senior Leadership Development Coaching

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question may be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there is a true injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you don’t organize yourself properly, you’ll pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you now, and you may say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not correct. You actually do care about that because if you are in pain, you will care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it’s very rare that you can find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this form of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to this, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something which bothers you and see if you can repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do this in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room just like a room, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what would I have to do?

And you have to ask yourself this, right? It is not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, just like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there would be a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there is some rubbish behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the space would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the cables, were not all tangled up the same way. And like, if you, if you let yourself just to consider the expanse where you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it which you could just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you’re coming to see me for childbirth, this easiest thing for us to do first would just be to get you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends upon how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say begin where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life will be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat daily, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines that you go through every day. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out immediately. So a hundred adjustments to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less rubbish and there’s a lot less crap around it.

A good deal fewer traps that you step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions together, and as soon as you’re acting out that, then it is possible to extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself and begin fixing up the things which are a part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there is this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for a decade. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be good if you could repair it, but you, have not got a clue about how to repair that. You simply walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it’s very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it is you right then and there, that should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter that is not working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to stay in your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it is very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your mind is a very strange thing. The moment you give it a title, a genuine aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That is actually how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, and that’s the reason why you have to bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you must get them on your body. So you are acting consistently. You’ve got to be real about the aim, but once you aim, the world will reconfigure itself around that aim, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of that, you’ve all seen this video in which you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and don’t see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you can get 1 thing through your mind and as a result of even being in college, that would be a great one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the right thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to decrease everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there is a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and that means you don’t need to take anythingthat particular phrase too far, you want to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it’s still a terrific thing to ask.