International Leadership Coach

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step one step backwards. The first question may be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It is something like that. You know, like there’s a real injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It is that if you do not organize yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you now, and you could say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not true. You truly do care about that because if you’re in pain, you may care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it is very rare you could find somebody who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this form of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to this, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something that disturbs you and see if you can repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do this in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room like a space, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you need to ask yourself that, right? It is not a command. It’s like a real question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, just like there is a heap of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that maybe little order there are a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some rubbish behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the space would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the cables, weren’t all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to consider the expanse in which you exist at the moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it that you can just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you were coming to see me for childbirth, this easiest thing for us to do would just be to get you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say begin where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, that you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life will be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat every day, because people usually think of those as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you’ve got your routines that you go through daily. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t have to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that’s exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out immediately. So a hundred adjustments to your broader domain of being, and there is a lot less crap and there is a lot less crap around it.

A good deal fewer traps that you step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s idea about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and once you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re willing to consider yourself and start fixing up the things which are part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there’s this guy who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for a decade. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be good if you could repair it, but you, have not got a clue about how to fix that. You just walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it is very likely that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, doesn’t mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you don’t walk up to a helicopter that isn’t working and just start tinkering away with it. You have to remain within your domain of competence. But the majority of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do this at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you reside and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your mind is a very strange thing. The moment you give it a name, a genuine aim, it’ll reconfigure the entire world in keeping with this goal. That’s actually how you see to begin with. And so in case you set it a task, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, and that’s why you must bring your ideas and emotions together. And then you have to get them on your body. So you’re acting consistently. You have to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself about that aim, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video in which you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and do not see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you can get 1 thing through your mind and as a consequence of even being in college, that would be a good one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative manner, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to decrease everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anything, even that particular phrase too far, you need to bind it together with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it’s still a terrific thing to ask.