Integral Leadership & Coaching

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question may be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is something like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there’s a true injunction at the base of it. It’s not some casual self-help doctrine. It is that if you do not organize yourself properly, you’ll pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you today, and you may say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not true. You truly do care about that because if you are in pain, you may care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it’s very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this form of pain is one of the things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there is not any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to that, and this is a phenomenological idea, too. It’s something like, look around for something that disturbs you and see if you can repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you enter, you can do it in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room like a space, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you need to ask yourself this, right? It is not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the room that, you know, just like there is a stack of papers over there. That’s kind of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there are a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some crap behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended for like six months. And the room would be slightly better if it was somewhat less dusty and the wires, were not all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there will be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it which you can just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you’re coming to see me for psychotherapy, this easiest thing for us to do would just be to get you to arrange your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the limits of your being. And I Would say start where you can begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of thinking about it as in need of repair, you could fix, then Hey, fix it. You fix a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat every day, because people usually think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you’ve got your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through daily. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they’re mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do every day. Those are the main things you do. Hands. All you have to do is do the arithmetic. You have figured out immediately. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there is a lot less rubbish and there is a lot less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis as soon as you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and as soon as you’re acting that out, then it is possible to extend what you’re willing to consider yourself and begin fixing up the things that are a part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you might say, imagine you’re walking down Bloor street and there’s this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for 10 years. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that’s a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, have not got a clue about how to repair that. You just walk around that and go find something you could fix, since if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it’s very likely you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you’re experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it’s you right then and there, which should repair them. You must have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter which is not working and just begin tinkering away with it. You have to stay within your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room as you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I will make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it is partly because your head is a very strange thing. As soon as you give it a title, a real aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That is really how you see to start with. And so in case you set it a job, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, which is the reason why you have to bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you must get them in your body. So you are acting consistently. You have to be real about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the world will reconfigure itself around that goal, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of that, you’ve all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and don’t see it.

It is like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five years, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you can get one thing through your mind and as a consequence of even being in college, that would be a great one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative way, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People today get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anythingthat specific phrase too far, you need to bind it with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it is still a great thing to ask.