Ilm Executive Coaching And Leadership Mentoring

What would you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question may be, why should you even bother improving yourself? And I think the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you have to. And maybe so others do not have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there is a true injunction at the base of it. It is not some casual self-help doctrine. It’s that if you don’t organize yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a big way. And so will the people around you today, and you could say, well, I do not care about that, but that’s actually not correct. You truly do care about that because if you’re in pain, you will care about it. And that means you do care about, even if it’s only that negative way, you know, it is very rare that you can find somebody who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I was out of this sort of pain is one of those things that brings the notion that it would be better if it didn’t exist along with it, it’s in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more dumb pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question might be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the reply to that, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It’s something like, look around for something that bothers you and see if you can fix it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do this in a room. It’s quite fun to do it. Just when you are sitting in a room just like a room, maybe your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I have to do?

And you have to ask yourself this, right? It’s not a command. It is like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, like there is a heap of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there would be a good thing. And you know, you haven’t, there is some crap behind your computer screen that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the space would be slightly better if it was somewhat less dusty and the cables, weren’t all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to consider the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That’ll pop out in it which you can just fix. And, you know, I would say, well, if you were coming to see me for psychotherapy, this simplest thing for us to do would just be to get you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends upon how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say start where you are able to begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, that you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life is going to be a whole lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat every day, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you have your routines that you go through every day. Well, those probably constitute 50% of your life. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to pay attention to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out immediately. So a hundred alterations to your wider domain of being, and there’s a lot less rubbish and there is a great deal less rubbish around it.

A lot fewer traps that you step into. And so that is in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and once you’re acting out that, then you can extend what you’re willing to consider yourself itself and begin fixing up the things which are part of your broader extent. Now, sometimes you do not know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there’s this guy who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for 10 years. He kind of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could fix it, but you, have not got a clue about how to fix that. You simply walk around that and go find something you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely that you’ll help that person, it’s very probable you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it’s you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter which isn’t working and just begin tinkering away with it. You have to remain within your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lives, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do this at the drop of a hat. You know, you go back to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for 30 minutes.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will pop up like mad. And it’s partly because your head is a very strange thing. The moment you give it a name, a real aim, it will reconfigure the world in keeping with that aim. That is really how you see to start with. And so in case you set it a job, especially you have to be real about it, and that’s the reason why you must bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you have to get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You’ve got to be genuine about the aim, but as soon as you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself about that aim, which is very strange. And it is, it’s, it’s technically correct. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video where you see the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black group.
And you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the middle of the video and do not see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five decades, that would be about the ideal amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that man, if you’re able to get 1 thing through your mind and as a consequence of even being in university, that would be a good one. You see exactly what you aim at. And so, because one inference you might draw from this is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
The way the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a really negative way, one thing to ask is, are you aiming at the right thing? Now?

You know, I am not trying to reduce everybody’s issues to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for all sorts of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have injuries, there is a random element to being that’s for sure. But, and so you don’t want to take anything, even that particular phrase too far, you need to bind it together with the fact that arbitrary things do happen to people, but it is still a great thing to ask.