Beverly Mostellar-bertok Life Coaching

What could you do to improve yourself? Well, let’s step 1 step backwards. The first question might be, why should you bother improving yourself? And I believe the answer to that is some thing like, so you don’t suffer any more stupidly than you need to. And maybe so others don’t have to either. It’s something like that. You know, like there’s a real injunction at the base of it. It’s not some casual self-improvement philosophy. It is that if you don’t arrange yourself properly, you will pay for it and in a significant way. And so will the people around you now, and you may say, well, I do not care about that, but that is actually not correct. You truly do care about that because if you’re in pain, you may care about it. And so you do care about, even if it’s just that negative way, you know, it’s very rare you could find someone who’s in excruciating pain who would ever say, well, it would be no better.

If I had been out of this form of pain is one of those things that brings the notion that it would be better if it did not exist along with it, it is in controvertible. So you get your act together so that there isn’t any more stupid pain around you than necessary. Well, so then the question may be, well, how would you go about getting your act together? And the answer to this, and this is a phenomenological notion, too. It is something like, look around for something which disturbs you and see if you’re able to repair it. So now you think, well, let’s say, let’s say you go into, you can do this in a room. It is quite fun to do it. Just when you’re sitting in a room like a space, possibly your bedroom, you can sit there and just sort of meditate on it and think, okay, if I wanted to spend 10 minutes making this room better, what do I must do?

And you need to ask yourself this, right? It’s not a command. It’s like a genuine question and things will pop out in the area that, you know, like there’s a heap of papers over there. That’s sort of bugging you. And you know, that perhaps little order there would be a fantastic thing. And you know, you haven’t, there’s some rubbish behind your computer monitor that you haven’t attended to for like six months. And the room would be slightly better if it was a little less dusty and the cables, were not all tangled up the identical way. And like, if you, if you allow yourself just to think about the expanse in which you exist at that moment, there’ll be all sorts of things. That will pop out in it which you can just fix. And, you know, I might say, well, if you were coming to see me for childbirth, this easiest thing for us to do would just be for you to organize your room. You think, well, is that psychotherapy? And the answer is, well, it depends on how you conceive the constraints of your being. And I Would say start where you can begin.

You know, If, if something announces itself to you, which is a strange way of considering it as in need of repair, you could repair, then Hey, fix it. You mend a hundred things like that. Your life will be a lot different. Now, I often tell people to repair the things you repeat daily, because people tend to think of these as trivial, right? You get, you brush your teeth, you have your breakfast. You know, you have your routines which you go through every day. Well, those likely constitute 50% of your lifetime. And people think, well, they are mundane. I don’t need to listen to them. It’s like, no, no, that is exactly wrong things you do daily. Those are the most important things you do. Hands. All you’ve got to do is do the arithmetic. You’ve figured out immediately. So a hundred adjustments to your wider domain of being, and there’s a lot less rubbish and there’s a great deal less crap around it.

A lot fewer traps for you to step into. And so that’s in keeping with Ewing’s thought about erasing the dis once you’ve got your mind and your emotions with each other, and once you’re acting that out, then it is possible to extend what you’re prepared to consider yourself itself and start fixing up the things that are part of your wider extent. Now, sometimes you don’t know how to do that. So you may say, imagine you are walking down Bloor street and there is this man who’s like schizophrenia and alcoholic and has been on the streets for 10 years. He sort of stumbled towards you and you know, incoherently mutters something, that is a problem. And it would be useful if you could repair it, but you, haven’t got a clue about how to repair that. You just walk around that and go find something that you could fix, because if you muck about it, that not only is it unlikely you will help that person, it is very likely that you’ll get hurt yourself.

So, you know, just because while you are experiencing things themselves, as in need of repair, does not mean that it is you right then and there, that should repair them. You have to have some humility. You know, you do not walk up to a helicopter that is not working and just start tinkering away with it. You need to stay within your domain of competence. But most of the time, if people look at their lifestyles, you know, it’s very interesting thing to do. I liked, I liked the concept of the room because you can do that at the drop of a hat. You know, you return to where you live and sit down and think, okay, I’m going to make this place better for half an hour.

What should I do If they have to ask And things will just pop up like mad. And it is partly because your mind is a very strange thing. The moment you give it a name, a real aim, it’ll reconfigure the entire world in keeping with that aim. That’s actually how you see to begin with. And so if you set it a job, especially you’ve got to be genuine about it, which is why you have to bring your thoughts and emotions together. And then you have to get them in your body. So you’re acting consistently. You’ve got to be genuine about the aim, but once you aim, the entire world will reconfigure itself about that aim, which is extremely strange. And it’s, it’s, it’s technically true. You know, the best example of this, you’ve all seen this video in which you watch the basketballs being tossed back and forth between members of the white team versus the black team.
And well, you’re doing that. A gorilla walks up into the center of the video and do not see it.

It’s like, you know, if you thought about that experiment for about five years, that would be about the right amount of time to spend thinking about it. Because what it shows you is that you see what you aim at and that guy, if you’re able to get one thing through your mind and as a result of even being in university, that would be a great one. You see what you aim at. And so, because one inference you could draw from that is be careful what you aim at,
Right? It what you aim at determines
How the world manifests itself to you. And so if the world is manifesting itself in a very negative way, one thing to ask is, are you planning at the perfect thing? Now?

You know, I’m not trying to reduce everybody’s problems to an improper aim. People get cut off at the knees for a variety of reasons. You know, they get sick, they have accidents, there’s a random element to being that is for sure. But, and so you don’t need to take anything, even that particular phrase too far, you want to bind it together with the fact that random things do happen to people, but it’s still a terrific thing to ask.